The One Thing Families Should Stop Doing
OCD impacts individuals and their loved ones. You may need your loved ones to reassure that nothing bad will happen or maybe they participate in compulsions so they can make you feel better.
In OCD treatment, it's important to learn about all the ways you try to get rid of anxiety or other distressing feelings to add them into your response prevention plan. One important piece to consider is ways your family participates in this.
This is called family accommodation. This means any changes your family member(s) does to prevent you from being triggered or to make you feel better.
Examples of Family Accommodation
Participating in compulsions by changing clothes when they get home, handwashing, or showering
Saying "you won't get sick from that."
Changing their work schedule or other activities because of your compulsions
Why Family Members Should Stop Accommodating OCD
They are reinforcing the message that your fear and anxiety are "bad" and can't be handled
It is impacting their life by creating anger, frustration, burn out, anxiety
The accommodations make your OCD worse in the long-run
How to Reduce Family Accommodations
It's best to do this together as a team
Sit down with your loved ones and educate them about family accommodations. Many times families don't know that this is harmful and/or don't know how to stop. They can think they are helping you.
List all the accommodations they do and make a plan on how to start to remove them
Give your family permission to remove one accommodation at a time so it's not so overwhelming
Written by Jenny Matthews, LMFT, LADC
Jenny is a therapist that specializes in helping over-thinkers and worriers get relief from anxiety so they can be present with their loved ones.
