How to Turn Flight Anxiety Setbacks into Progress
If you recently experienced a setback with your flight anxiety, whether it led to canceling your trip or enduring an anxious journey, you might be feeling disheartened and self-critical. It's crucial to recognize that setbacks are a normal part of the journey when dealing with anxiety. Despite the disappointment, there are valuable lessons to be learned from these experiences.
Give Yourself Credit
Firstly, acknowledge any progress you've made, no matter how small it may seem. Perhaps you took steps toward facing your fear by booking a flight in the first place or maybe this time you didn’t self-medicate during the flight.
Every effort counts, and it's essential to give yourself credit for any small changes. Change isn’t all or nothing and is a process.
Stop Beating Yourself Up
Instead of dwelling on the setback, focus on what you can learn from it. Avoid the temptation to criticize yourself harshly; self-compassion is key to moving forward constructively.
Are you calling yourself a pathetic loser? I want you to ask yourself if you would talk that way to a friend who made a mistake. I’m guessing not. You need to treat yourself how you would treat a friend.
And rather than shaming yourself, channel your energy into understanding why the setback occurred and how you can use it as motivation to overcome future challenges. I have a free Learning from Setbacks Worksheet you can download to help you learn from the setback.
Why Is Flying Important To You?
Consider why flying is important to you. Reflect on the reasons behind your desire to confront your fear, and let these motivations guide your next steps. Remember, just because you didn't succeed this time doesn't mean you won't succeed in the future.
If you feel defeated right now, it can feel really hard to decide to get back on the horse and keep riding. But instead of focusing on how your feelings of defeat, think about why this is important to you and how overcoming this fear can open up your world.
I recently wrote a blog about how to understand your motivation so that it can serve as fuel during challenging moments. You can check that out here.
What Did You Do To Prepare For This Flight?
Reflect on the preparations you made for the flight. It’s not uncommon for people to wait until the month before their flight to start practicing effective skills. But depending on where you are in your journey, that may not have been enough time.
I wrote a blog recently about some ways I prepared for an upcoming flight. You can read that here.
Perhaps this time you need some additional support. There's no shame in reaching out for help, whether through therapy, medication, or a fear of flying course.
Recognize that you don't have to figure this out on your own, and investing in support can significantly improve your chances of success.
Have Reasonable Expectations
It's also essential to have reasonable expectations for yourself. Anxiety during a flight doesn't mean you failed; it's how you respond to that anxiety that matters most.
Instead of focusing solely on the absence of anxiety, concentrate on developing coping strategies and resilience.
Remember, progress is not always linear, and setbacks are opportunities for growth. It can help to expect that there will be setbacks, because that will keep you from giving up all together.
As long as you keep learning and keep flying, you will get there.
Need More Support With Your Fear of Flying?
If you need more help with flying anxiety, Grab the Free Flight Anxiety Toolkit for my top 12 tips here.
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Turbulence Toolkit: Your Key to Confident Flying Starts Here
Download the Free Audio Exercise for Taming Turbulence
If you've ever felt a surge of anxiety when the plane hits turbulence, you're not alone. Like many others, I've experienced the challenges of flying anxiety firsthand. However, over time, I've discovered strategies that have transformed my flying experience from nerve-wracking to confident. In this blog post, I'll share a combination of practical tips and a free guided audio track to help you navigate through turbulence with confidence.
Understanding Turbulence:
Turbulence can trigger feelings of anxiety and discomfort, but understanding its nature can help alleviate some of those fears. One helpful tip is to learn about how aircraft handle turbulence. I recently came across a TikTok video that compared planes to jello, offering a unique visual perspective that helped me understand turbulence better.
Expecting turbulence as a normal part of flying can also make a significant difference in how we perceive it. Rather than hoping for a smooth flight, acknowledging turbulence as a routine occurrence can help reduce anticipatory anxiety.
Practical Tips for Managing Turbulence:
While understanding turbulence is helpful, practical strategies can provide additional support during turbulent moments. Here are some tips that have personally helped me manage flying anxiety:
Skip the turbulence prediction apps and trust in the expertise of pilots to navigate through turbulent conditions safely.
Try lifting your feet off the floor during turbulence to reduce the sensations you feel. It may sound simple, but some swear by this technique.
Don't let fear dictate your choices when it comes to flying. Instead of avoiding certain seats or flight times, focus on building your confidence and resilience in handling anxiety during flights.
Consider the perspective of pilots, who often prefer flying through turbulence for efficiency. They only try to avoid turbulence for the comfort of the passengers. Trusting in their experience can help ease your mind during turbulent moments.
Keep flying and face your fears head-on. The more familiar and comfortable you become with flying, the less impact turbulence will have on your overall experience.
Free Audio Exercise for Handling Turbulence:
In addition to these practical tips, I'm excited to share a valuable resource with you: a free audio exercise designed to help you manage turbulence anxiety during flights. Take it with you on your next flight to help you stay calm during any rough air you experience.
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Behind the Scenes of My Recent Flight Experience
For years, the thought of boarding a plane filled me with dread. Each time I flew, I was struck by anxiety, casting a shadow over what should have been moments of excitement. But as I stepped off my flight this week, a sense of accomplishment washed over me.
While my flight anxiety tries to still pull me in, I've learned valuable lessons along the way.
Flight anxiety is a complex beast, capable of robbing even the most adventurous souls of their sense of freedom. It's a struggle I know intimately, but one that has also taught me resilience.
You may be wondering if I practiced any exercises, like deep breathing or guided meditations, and the answer is no. I used to use these coping strategies, but no longer need to at this stage of my journey.
Rather than relying solely on traditional coping mechanisms, I choose to accept it as a natural part of the human experience rather than fighting it. I can coexist with my discomfort without letting it control me.
Two days leading up to my flight, I wasn’t having any worried thoughts, but my body still tried to “warn me” about the dangers of flying (which is normal and I expected this is). My body was reacting HARD. Nausea gripped me and my appetite vanished.
I didn’t like this at all. It made it very hard to function.
However, I found some helpful ways to handle it. One, I got outside for a walk and this helped a lot. This next part sounds silly but it helped a lot….I made a video of myself talking about my experience. I found that after I made the video I felt a lot better.
This was surprising to me, it reminded me of the power of sharing your feelings…even if it’s just with yourself.
Ensuring to still eat was also very important. Applesauce pouches came to the rescue on this one.
On the day of my flight, I woke up excited to leave. In the past, I have said goodbye to my kids in a way like it would be my last time. I didn’t do that this time. It was more challenging than I expected but I was proud of myself.
One goodbye was enough.
I trusted I would get home to them again.
As we taxied down the runway I was met with familiar jitters as we prepared for takeoff. But this time, I approached this by reminding myself “this is exactly the practice I need right now.” I carried on with a good show (humorous and familiar sitcoms are my go-to) to keep me occupied. With each wave of turbulence, I remained calm, knowing it was like riding the waves on a ship.
I was relaxed the entire flight. No alcohol. No meds. It was all because of the mindset shifts and skills I have been practicing all this time. It didn’t happen overnight. But with committed action, it’s something I can be proud of.
If you struggle with flight anxiety, I want you to know that you can get better. The way I experienced anxiety when flying 10 years ago compared to today are very different. I don’t feel like I need to over prepare myself for a flight. I have some discomfort but am overall unfazed by it.
Just imagine the amazing places you can go when anxiety isn’t standing in your way.
Ready to take the first step towards overcoming your fear of flying? Join the waitlist for our Fearful Flyer’s Blueprint Course to be the first to know when enrollment opens.
Proactive Steps I’m Taking to Fly Confidently Next Month
Curious about making your next flight less nerve-wracking? I'm sharing exactly what I'm doing a month before my next flight to step on the plane with confidence.
My Ups and Downs with Flight Anxiety
It’s been two years since I’ve flown. Not because of anxiety, just life got in the way of being able to travel. I’m traveling next month, and so far…really looking forward to it.
Since having kids, opportunities to be able to travel by plane have been much fewer.
If you know me, you know I’m vocal about my history with flight anxiety. It was rough years ago, never completely stopping me from flying but making it pretty difficult to want to travel.
During the years I traveled a bunch, it got easier. But then it got worse….. again. Then better.
Years later, I now totally get why my experience was full of ups and downs. For one, it’s normal based on any life stressors.
Mistakes I Made
But mostly, I had no idea that so many of the things I was doing (like pretending I wasn’t on a plane or scanning the flight crew) were actually making my fear worse, rather than better.
It's incredible how you can unknowingly exacerbate your anxiety (and why this is such a crucial part of what I cover in my Fearful Flyer’s Blueprint course).
So even though I don't travel often, I find I am far more confident when I fly….and without self-medicating with cocktails.
Just because I am more confident now, that doesn’t mean I act like my anxiety is gone. I know that it could show up. So I am about a month out from my next flight and want to share with you how I am preparing myself for it.
My Flight Prep
For starters, even though I have many reasons to believe I will have minimal to low anxiety, I’m still remaining open to the possibility that it will show up. This is an attitude shift.
Rather than hoping I don’t have any anxiety, I’m simply just making space for it to be there if it shows up. This helps me to not get into a struggle with any anxiety.
It allows me to treat it matter-of-factly, “oh there you are anxiety, I had a feeling you’d show up.”
I am also seeking opportunities for discomfort right now…. long before my flight. I recently took my kids on a ferris wheel and it triggered some uncomfortable thoughts and sensations.
I was excited to experience that. I know that sounds weird but it’s another attitude shift that’s so important.
By seeking out the discomfort, I said “yes, I GET to practice” and this throw’s anxiety off its game. Riding a ferris wheel is a pretty low level exposure for me, but I will take any practice when I can.
I am not triggered by worries about my upcoming flight (yet), but if I were to become worried, I would be sure to stay away from googling anything to search for answers to my worry questions.
I also plan to catch myself starting to entertain any scary stories, because I know that is within my control.
In a Nutshell
As I approach my upcoming flight, my focus is on simple, effective strategies: expect it, allow it, seek discomfort, and avoid investing in possibilities. And here's a tool to make your next flight smoother – our Free Flight Anxiety Toolkit. Packed with practical tips for in-the-moment ease, it's yours to grab.
What to Do When Turbulence Gives You Anxiety
If you're like me and have struggled with a bit of flying anxiety, you know that handling turbulence can be a real challenge. But the good news, is that I’ve learned how to become much more confident as a flyer. In this blog, I'll share some tips that have helped me and might help you too.
Learn about the aircraft: Ever wondered how planes handle turbulence? I stumbled upon this TikTok video that compares planes to jello. It's a great visual and helps you to understand turbulence so you can put your mind at ease.
Expect the Bumps: Easier said than done, right? But expecting turbulence as a normal part of flying can actually make a huge difference. If you approach flying by hoping you don’t have a turbulent flight, then it’s going to add to your anxiety because you are expecting something that you have no control over.
Skip the Turbulence Apps: Planning to predict turbulence with an app? Hold that thought. These apps are notoriously inaccurate, and pilots are the real pros at navigating through turbulence. Trust their expertise and save yourself from unnecessary worry.
Lift Your Feet: I haven't personally tried this one, but some swear by it. During turbulence, raise your feet off the floor. It supposedly reduces the sensations you feel. Give it a shot and let me know if it works for you!
Don't Let Fear Dictate Your Choices: Choosing a specific seat, time of day to fly, or specific destinations won't make turbulence disappear. So don’t create conditions for yourself on where you will fly to in attempt to avoid turbulence. Plan your trips based on where you want to go and work on handling your anxiety (rather than trying to control turbulence).
Pilot's Perspective: Pilots prefer flying through turbulence for efficiency. Knowing this gave me a whole new perspective. They're not avoiding it for safety reasons but to provide more comfort. Trust in their experience and let that ease your mind.
Keep Flying: The more you fly, the more familiar and comfortable you become with the process. I had a period of time years ago with frequent trips, and it honestly made me feel like a pro flyer. I became so experienced with flying that the bumps didn’t phase me. Keep flying, face your fears, and you’ll get more confident.
If you need more help with flying anxiety, Grab the Free Flight Anxiety Toolkit for my top 12 tips here.
Packing for Peace: Essential Items for Anxious Flyers
If the thought of spending hours on a plane sends shivers down your spine, you're not alone. I've been there, eyes shut, desperately trying to ignore the reality of the flight. It was miserable until I figured out my own formula for a cozy, busy, and calm flight. So, let's dive into items you should pack in your carry-on to make your next flight a breeze.
Comfort from Head to Toe
Headphones: Be sure to bring your own headphones. Pro-tip: bring both wired and wireless ones. Because most airlines don’t have bluetooth capabilities on the TVs on the back of the seat in front of you and the flight crew may not be handing out headphones until later in the flight. If the noises on the plane bother you, consider packing Noise-canceling headphones to drown out the sounds.
Neck Pillow: It’s hard enough to sleep on a plane when anxiety is running through your veins, but your chances are better for sleep and relaxation if you pack a neck pillow..
Eye Mask: If you plan to try and sleep, it can be great to bring your own sleep mask so you can shut out the sunlight and distractions.
Comfy Clothes: Don’t bother wearing jeans or anything fancy. You’re going to be sitting for a while in a less than ideal seat (unless you are flying first class), so wear something cozy. I like wearing my cozy wool socks and joggers. Your body temps can vary on the plane (especially as your anxiety ebs and flows) so dress in layers so you can always be comfortable.
Mindful Distractions
Entertainment: Download movies, podcasts, or audiobooks for a pleasant distraction. Find a new series on Netflix that you can binge watch on the flight. If you plan to watch it on your device, then I recommend downloading it at home in advance so that you can watch it before you have wifi available on the flight.
Reading Material: Bring a favorite book or a calming magazine.
Puzzle Games: One of my favorite activities for an anxious mind is something that requires you to focus, like a game. Try a crossword or sudoku puzzle.
Notes: I’m a planner so I like to be productive on the flight by planning. You can make an itinerary for your trip, make a meal plan, or on your return flight make your to-do list for the week you get home (maybe even order groceries and get them scheduled for delivery to make the week easy-peasy!)
If you need other ideas for how to keep busy on a plane, check out my blog on 50 Things to Do on a Plane.
Nourishment for Your Body
Hydration: Bring an empty reusable water bottle through security and the fill up before your flight to stay hydrated.
Healthy Snacks: Pack light, nutritious snacks to keep your energy up.
Snacks for Calm: If you are prone to motion sickness, pack some ginger chews to help ease nausea.
Soothing Scents
Essential Oils: Bring a calming scent, like lavender, to promote relaxation. You can put a few drops on a cotton ball at home and place it in a ziploc for convenience while traveling.
Scented Lotion: Your favorite lotion can be soothing and comforting. Just be sure it’s in a travel size container so the TSA doesn’t snatch it from you.
Anxiety-Busting Tools
Playlist: Create a playlist of songs to boost your mood. It could be calming, favorite tunes, or motivational. I personally love a motivational playlist as a way to get pumped up and ready to face my fears.
Breathing Exercises: My quick go-to breathing exercise is to imagine breathing in something hot…like tea, and then cool it down with your breath. There are a ton of different breathing exercises out there, find one you like and use it as needed.
Intense Candy: If you're prone to panic attacks, consider carrying a candy with a bold, intense flavor like sour or spicy (like WarHeads). The strong sensation in your mouth can be a powerful distraction.
Take these tips as a starting point and modify them based on what you like the best. My pro tip to you is to have a variety of options to keep yourself busy and calm so that you can switch it up as needed. Don’t expect any one single tip here to eliminate your anxiety completely. Your anxiety doesn’t work like a light switch that you can just switch off. But these items can help you to get through your flight with ease.
If you need more help with flying anxiety, Grab the Free Flight Anxiety Toolkit for my top 12 tips here.
Takeoff Time: 50 Things to Do on a Plane When You're Bored
Flying can be anxiety-inducing, especially when "what if" thoughts start to creep in. Boredom and anxiety make for a challenging combination.
In this blog post, we've put together a list of 43 engaging activities to help you ease those nerves at 30,000 feet. From reading and watching movies to practicing mindfulness and learning a new language, having a well-planned set of activities can transform your flight into a more comfortable and enjoyable experience.
50 Things You Can Do While Flying to Beat Boredom (so that anxiety doesn’t creep in)
Read a book
Watch in-flight movies.
Listen to music or podcasts.
Solve puzzles, like crosswords or Sudoku.
Work on a jigsaw puzzle app.
Play mobile games.
Write in a travel journal. Click here for ideas.
Plan your trip itinerary.
Edit and organize photos on your device.
Sketch or draw.Click here for ideas.
Listen to an audiobook.
Make a list of new restaurants you want to try on your trip.
Learn a new language with language learning apps.
Catch up on work or study.
Watch travel documentaries.
Meditate or practice deep breathing exercises.
Do light stretches in your seat.
Chat with your seatmate.
People-watch.
Try out a coloring book for adults.
Listen to white noise or calming sounds.
Play card games or board games with a travel-sized set.
Plan your next vacation.
Organize your digital files.
Play Sudoku or other brain-teaser games.
Create a to-do list for when you land.
Practice mindfulness and live in the moment.
Try origami with an airline napkin.
Create a travel bucket list.
Listen to a guided relaxation audio.
Knit or crochet.
Strike up a conversation with a flight attendant.
Solve riddles or brainteasers.
Learn about the history and culture of your destination.
Plan your return trip.
Organize your email or digital life.
Solve a Rubik's Cube or similar puzzle.
Meal prep for your trip to save money on eating out.
Practice your photography skills.
Do word searches or crossword puzzles.
Learn about the airline and its services.
Listen to comedy podcasts for a good laugh.
Learn about constellations and stargazing.
Start a travel blog.
Create a playlist of your favorite travel songs.
Explore the airline's in-flight entertainment system.
Read travel magazines or brochures.
Catch up on the news
Meal prep from the week you get home to remove some of the stress of returning home.
Explore new topics on youtube, such as minimalism, how to take great photos using your iphone, how to get out of debt
Why let anxiety overshadow the joy of air travel? Embrace this chance to immerse yourself in engaging activities that not only keep your mind occupied but also bring a sense of calm to your flight. Consider this time as an opportunity to explore new interests and cultivate your knowledge.
When you approach flying as a moment for relaxation, personal growth, or connecting with fellow travelers, you take a significant step toward becoming a more confident flyer. Keep moving forward, and make the most of your flight!
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How To Support an Anxious Flyer
Traveling with someone anxious about flying? Check out this article on Travel and Leisure Magazine that Jenny contributed to for helpful tips on how to support your loved one.
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